It tasted like a dessert but wasn't too sweet, one of my new favorites, It was so a good morning after a hard night of binging and just not feeling good about myself, I let ed take over my mind and I never want it to happen again. I even went out to the grocery store to buy binge food, and I felt horrible, knowing what I was about to do, it was so sad, but something happened at the check-out, I saw a guy from my college, whom I know pretty well, and he asked me how I was doing?, I was so embarrased as he had interrupted ed's plans to get me back to my empty dorm room and just binge. So this helped and my binge was short lived, I'm so happy now I realize there is so much more to life, beyond this ed and that moment captured it as it is somenone I greatly respect whom I saw during my episode. I'm still fighting for control of my life and its a tough fight, It seems so easier just to give in like I have in the past, but this time I will not!!! I have to repeat to myself, "This is my life, not eds, and I want to enjoy whom I am and not waste time on ed behaviors"
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Fighting
I slept in till 11:30 today, I've been on a strange schedule and just did hw all morning/afternoon before I go to work, ahh so much for leaving things till the last minute, I had a delicous new yogurt flavor for breakfast along with my granola and strawberries.
It tasted like a dessert but wasn't too sweet, one of my new favorites, It was so a good morning after a hard night of binging and just not feeling good about myself, I let ed take over my mind and I never want it to happen again. I even went out to the grocery store to buy binge food, and I felt horrible, knowing what I was about to do, it was so sad, but something happened at the check-out, I saw a guy from my college, whom I know pretty well, and he asked me how I was doing?, I was so embarrased as he had interrupted ed's plans to get me back to my empty dorm room and just binge. So this helped and my binge was short lived, I'm so happy now I realize there is so much more to life, beyond this ed and that moment captured it as it is somenone I greatly respect whom I saw during my episode. I'm still fighting for control of my life and its a tough fight, It seems so easier just to give in like I have in the past, but this time I will not!!! I have to repeat to myself, "This is my life, not eds, and I want to enjoy whom I am and not waste time on ed behaviors"
It tasted like a dessert but wasn't too sweet, one of my new favorites, It was so a good morning after a hard night of binging and just not feeling good about myself, I let ed take over my mind and I never want it to happen again. I even went out to the grocery store to buy binge food, and I felt horrible, knowing what I was about to do, it was so sad, but something happened at the check-out, I saw a guy from my college, whom I know pretty well, and he asked me how I was doing?, I was so embarrased as he had interrupted ed's plans to get me back to my empty dorm room and just binge. So this helped and my binge was short lived, I'm so happy now I realize there is so much more to life, beyond this ed and that moment captured it as it is somenone I greatly respect whom I saw during my episode. I'm still fighting for control of my life and its a tough fight, It seems so easier just to give in like I have in the past, but this time I will not!!! I have to repeat to myself, "This is my life, not eds, and I want to enjoy whom I am and not waste time on ed behaviors"
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
wow. that's like a divine intervention right there. I know it's a tough battle, and we need to be constantly vigilant and in battle-mode. don't let ED destroy us! as the fighting goes on, you will wear ED down and he won't be as strong anymore. praying for you in your incredible journey.
hi there! I moved to wordpress! come find me there~
sounds like a great yogurt :)
stay strong!
Post a Comment